someday is here

Posted by Deb on Oct 24th, 2011 in change, goals, grad school | 1 comment

When I was in my last year of undergrad at the University of Oklahoma, I expressed an interest in graduate studies. But at the time, I wasnt ready and I had no idea what direction I wanted to go with my life.

That was 11 1/2 years ago.

I think I know what I want to be when I grow up now. Graduate school has been a blip on my radar for 2 or 3 years now. A small blip.

This weekend I had a conversation with my dad and he asked what was stopping me. So I thought about it truthfully for a few minutes. Can you guess my only reason?

Fear.

Yep…fear of getting started. Fear of change. Fear of getting outside my comfort zone and exposing myself to real work and criticism. Fear of finding out whether Ill be really good at is or if Ill suck.

Fear.

I took the first step this morning and filled out the application. I have not yet submitted it.

This afternoon, I have to ask my boss, her boss, and my former boss for professional references since it HAS been 11+ years since undergrad and my favorite professors have all retired and/or passed away.

Fear.

Yes, Im scared to the bone, but Im getting through it. One step at a time.